It is in my nature to have a somewhat (just a wee, wee bit) snarkish online presence. I do this in order to avoid dealing with my “real feelings” as my imaginary therapist would put it. Or, maybe I’m just plain weird. Who knows? But. . . As the holiday weekend passes, I am reminded that I have tons to thank God for (not to mention being thankful for God himself). In no particular order (cause intentional ordering would require a lot of planning on my part, and that’s not how I roll), here I go:
1. My husband
Ever have someone walk out of the pages of a storybook into your life? What I did to deserve him, I’ll never know (I mean, what is he getting out of this deal?). At the end of one of my worst days, he takes my hand and answers my neverending question: Will we have a baby? with a simple, reassuring Yes, we will.
2. My family
Here’s a secret about me: I have won the lottery! The family lottery! I’ve been blessed with parents and siblings (and others) who love me for me. I truly believe family is your first and most important treasure on this earth. This reminds me of a quote from one of my favorite books: “I think all of us are always five years old in the presence and absence of our parents.” So very true.
3. My furbabies
Yes, I have three and they are my children now and will continue to be after the addition of human children. Yes, my chihuahua is whining softly and pitifully at me as I type, trying to convince me she is starving and, yes, my other dog just sprinkled my laptop with his urine, but I cannot picture my life without them. Unconditional love, all the time.
4. My insurance
Let’s face it. If I didn’t have the insurance (and job) I have now, there would be no “conceivable” way to pay for fertility treatments and medication. Not a chance! It’s funny–later you see how things have worked out for you in the long run, even when you thought things were hopeless earlier.
5. My friends
I have some. They are awesome. Even if they did conceive children at the drop of a hat! I’m happy to say my best friend has really come through for me as I go through infertility. I assumed that she would only offer condescending advice as others, have but she uttered two words for me that have made all the difference: “I’m sorry.”
6. My health
I am healthy and for the first time in a very long time, I feel good. Until two weeks ago, I came home from work, exhausted, got in bed with my dinner, watched a little TV and fell asleep. Then, my sister-in-law convinced me to join a gym where various classes are offered each night. Well, somehow I found the strength I never knew I had and joined. I mean, I have these tiny, cute muscles forming beside my knee caps! I didn’t even know those existed! (not my knee caps–the muscles!!)
7. Hope
I used to say, “I don’t want hope. I want a baby.” Well, I found out the hard way that hope is always necessary and should never be wished away. So, now I have it. I want to hold on to it. It’s the foundation of everything.
TheStorkDiaries 